Yikes 38W

Technically 12 days til “D” day. Arrival date is my late Grandmother’s birthday so as much as I want this to be done, it would be amazing for my son to share her birthdate.
I feel eh. Mainly the pubic bone pain makes me act like Chris Farley putting a small coat on when I try to roll over in bed, put pants on, or use my foot to swoosh my cat out of my way (he tries killing me by running between my feet). Mood wise I am scared and anxious of labor pains. My plan is to not do the epidural but I haven’t completely ruled it out either. I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.
The nursery is done now BUT our bathroom is another story. We found black mold so we gutted it about 2 months ago and it has been an ongoing project like that Tom Hanks movie Money Pit. It has been a nightmare. Both the tub and shower wall we ordered were delivered cracked or broken. Awesome. Drywall WAS my husbands gig years ago before joining the Army and becoming a police officer. Let’s just say he should stick to arresting people. God bless him but dayum. He has done a great job but not exactly the quickest. I am questioning the ceiling where I can totally see air bubbles in the seam tape. I shall not say shit or I’ll get the look. So whatever. I’m not a control freak (lies) but I do best when the house is in order. I do not function well amongst chaos and I’m freaking that we will be painting when I am tired and home with a 3 day old.
Ok. Enough about that- getting in and out of my Jeep is getting pretty damn uncomfortable these days. I LOVE my car but I hate the 4″ lift at the moment. My pubes feel like fire when I step in or out. I could drive the husband’s Tahoe buuuuuuuuut the last time I attempted that I smelled smoke coming from a tire. Why but of course!! The wheel bearing needs replaced because we have all the time in the world to jerk around with that. Needless to say it sits in the garage and we just use the jeep. Luckily he has a take home cruiser for work so he never rarely needs the Jeep and I have never been without a car. He refuses to take it to a drive thru (afraid a disgruntled somebody will spit in his latte or burger) or to the store or any other personal related matter. He firmly believes it is for work only. I’m sure some officers abuse that privilege but considering they put their lives on the line everyday at work I would say that using those cars in their own time is or should be a given perk… Also- police presence is sometimes enough to keep things chill in the surrounding area. Husbands point of view is pretty much- this is my office. I don’t want to sit in my office on my day off. I get it- but c’mon man!!!! My twat bone hurts so take the damn cruiser when we go out to eat or fix the Tahoe!!!!!!!
And then there is the bar/restaurant I am opening. F.
I intended for a soft opening prior to Super Bowl. Then I settled for a pushed back date of St.Patrick’s Day. But, between special order or back order for crap we needed or the basic hold ups from contractors…. Now I am looking at an opening date in about 4 weeks. AWESOME SAUCE. A 2 week old, training staff, setting up POS systems, ordering food and booze, being present for final inspection, and grand opening. This should be fun.
So there is life in a nutshell for me lately. I won’t even discuss my photography business because it had been non existent with all of the other chaos. That truly saddens me because I adore it. I need it. Ugh.
I know it sounds like I’m bitchy but in all honesty I am super stoked to meet our son in 12 days give or take. I’m so happy to see all of the recent success stories on here and I am also amazed at the strength of the women who have not found their answer yet. Every blog I read inspires me in some way or the other and I look forward reading updates when I can. To all of you- good luck, good vibes, happy moments, and all my love.
PS- I look like hell in this pic !!!! It was a long day, I was tired, and standing in office at bar that I can’t seem to finish!!!!!

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26-27 weeks

Time is flying!! Nursery is slow going due to house remodeling projects we decided to finish first- suckers for punishment. My best gals started the baby shower planning and they plan on dressing like Thing 1 and Thing 2. Epic. They say they’re going with footy pjs but by the time it rolls around I bet money they’ll be opting for red shirts and a wig they can take off. Either way, I love these ladies and couldn’t ask for better friends. The theme is obviously Dr.Seuss and it is going to be amazing. We also decided to do a man friendly one. Hubby is in like Flynn. Free food and a ton of women= happy man!!
Going to get that nursery started asap. Meanwhile, I will be eating Golden Grahams (newest must have) man they get soggy fast!!!
Hoping to catch a movie with hubby this weekend but with all the work we have ahead us I don’t know if it’s in our stars. Drawing closer to the bar opening as well and dealing with these contractors have not become any easier. I loathe these guys and I have snapped several times. It puts them in check for maybe a few days and then I have to flip the bitch switch again. I intended opening Feb.1. I’ll be lucky if it’s March 1st now.
Anywho- back to the house, all we have left really is a full bathroom makeover. Like serious gut and redo. We were going to pass on the idea and buy a new home but we’ve decided to wait a year or two before stabbing a for sale sign in the yard. We love our home now but we look forward to being away from the city and the university. Hubby needs a break. After working on 6 off 3 rotations for 10 years on a midnight shift, he needs a quiet place to chill and not hear sirens, Notre Dame games (seriously can hear PA system in our yard on game day), thumping stereos, or people mowing their lawn at 8am when he didn’t even hit a pillow until 7am.
Here is my most recent belly pic:

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This boy is a MOVER!!! He boogies half the day away!! My anterior placenta hasn’t dulled the feeling much at all. Maybe he kicked it out of the way hahhaha
We are convinced he’ll be a bad ass like his daddy.
Gave the IVF clinic a ring to say hello to my favorite nurse and to keep her updated. I love them! So sweet to want to stay in touch like that instead of “K you’re pregnant! Bye bye!”.
Off to eat a brownie the size of my couch with a glass of milk the size of a water tower and then off to bed so I can wake up every hour with hip pain or public bone pain. (Yeah- that feels grrrrrrrrreat)
Man did I bounce around in this blog or what? Zero structure. I guess this is what my brain is like right now- scattered and all over the place. I need a new pair of converse- red.
That is all.
Kisses to those who love me and a finger to those who don’t.
And a huge wish of luck and love to the ladies’ blogs I still follow who are still TTC.
Until I have time to blog via iPhone again— be real, be good, or be good at it.

Weekly update- WEEK 13

How far along: 13w3d

Baby’s size: approx. 3″ long. About the size of a peach. (I assume they mean balled up? Or maybe the length of a peach? I’ve eaten peaches much bigger than this.

Total weight gain: have no clue. Last appointment at 10 weeks I was up 3.4lbs from where I was when I left IVF doctor. I don’t own a scale. Never have. I go by inches. And so far I’m doing pretty ok. I’m sure that shit will change some day. Until then, enjoying the minor bloat? Poof? Tummy? Intestines migrating north to make room for uterus? Hell I don’t know.

Maternity clothes: Nope. Been managing with hair ties and belly bands. My favorite wardrobe choice= adorbs shirt with jacket or cardigan combo/or long sweater and my favorite rider boots over a pair of comfy stretch pants. Time to go buy more boots :))) darn.

Stretch marks: so far so good. If it happens, I’ll be researching laser correction. Not really the vain type but I do prefer bikinis. And don’t get me wrong- I will cherish each and every mark this baby gives me (for the short time I decide to keep those marks)

Sleep: I fall out in less than 2 minutes but wake up 2-3 times to pee. For the most part I sleep 8-10 hours but sometimes I can’t get back to sleep once my eyes open.Woke up at 5:45 on Saturday morning and that was it. Up all day till 11.

Symptoms/Feeling: tired “ish” but nothing too crazy. No nausea or morning sickness–just the occassional awesome dry heave. And speaking of feeling…. I CANNOT feel my fundus!! Is there a fundus amongus? I know how to and what to feel for but can’t find it!!!! Another bullet to add to the “Why Tina Worries” list. Am I the only one?

Best moment of this week: doctor appointment in 2 days- I’m sure that will be my highlight as I hope to be reassured that the heart is still beating. I’m sick with worry. 2nd moment- signing papers for liquor license for the new bar and grill I’m opening. Yay!!!

Miss anything: buttoning my silver jeans and not being scared to have sex or the big “O”. Don’t ask me why. I know that doc said fine but I’m still nervous and apprehensive. Gve in to hubs once. Thank God he is patient and understands my anxiety.

Movement: I’m sure the babe is cutting a rug in there but I doubt I feel it. Every once in awhile I feel a blurb but I’ll chalk it up to gas :0

Food cravings: Italiano. All. Day. Everyday. Maybe some Mexican food in between. (And fruity pebbles). Hell I want everything.

Anything making you queasy or sick: just my ultra sensitive gag reflex. No nausea to warn me it’s coming though. Just a certain smell or for no reason at all I’ll dry heave for a second and feel fine afterwards. Weird

Have you started to show yet: not really. Can’t wait to though- maybe it would reassure me that things are moving along appropriately? Doubtful hah!

Gender: It’s a mystery still. Debating on finding out through chromosome test. Hubby thinks ultrasound would be more exciting for the reveal. Personally, I wanna know what to start shopping for!!!! Well, when I feel less scared about this then I’ll start shopping.

Labor signs: ummmmm no

Belly button in or out: In, and reallllllly hoping it stays that way. Eeeewwww

Wedding rings on or off: On.

Happy or moody most of the time: Those who know me say I’m moody but honestly I think I’m overall happy with a dash of fear and anxiety. Husband says I just seem more sensitive and cry more. Not like a mad or sad cry- like a “oh wow that commercial for Kleenex was so sweet” kinda cry.

Looking forward to: Actually showing and being less worried about this pregnancy ending. When will it end??!!

Purchases for baby: A handful of Dr.Seuss books and stuffed animals to go with the Seuss themed nursery 🙂 a friend of ours does interior design and I am SO excited to see what she comes up with. Just got a beautiful solid wood/ painted white armoire to go in there. How much? FREE!!! Gotta love friends. And speaking of purchases- I hope they make a toast costume for babies because hubby and I are bacon and eggs this year for Halloween. Next year we shall add toast 🙂

Almost 10 weeks!

I had my last appointment with RE which finished with a big tear filled hug. Even HE was teary eyed!! He was so awesome. We will miss him dearly. The ultrasound was amazing! Little babe was raisin’ the roof! Like seriously. Both hands up in the air with the arms pushing up and down haha. Loved it. There was a whole lot of squirming too when the tech was trying to get measurements. We’re over the moon. I guess it’s time to make myself a client at my photography biz and come up with a crafty way to announce the news. Not sure what angle I’m gonna go with. Most likely humor as it best fits the hubby and I. We are a tad on the dork level and spend most of our time acting like fools so…..
Time to say cheese for myself!!! And time to put the timer and tripod to use (which I’ve never used either cuz I hate tripods) can’t wait to post pics!!!
Oh, and a side note…
My biggest baby and first sweet chubby love- Murphy, turned 8 today. We celebrated accordingly and spoiled him rotten with table scraps and a puppy sundae. Our other fur baby was happy to participate.

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My guardian angel IS real

Heard that beautiful heartbeat at 120bpm!!! Measures came back right on track as well. So I am 7w2d now and hoping our next ultrasound on September 23rd is the same good news. I have to thank my guardian angel for this one. Meanwhile, no nausea unless I get hungry, still the mild cramping from time to time but nothing painful or horrible. I fall asleep easy but I’m up to the toilet 1-3 times a night an if I wake up around 5 am I’m hungry and can’t fall back asleep. It’s so funny how you hope and pray for this day to come so you can be happy and have a breath of relief. Instead I am just worrying along the way and hoping all goes well and overanalyzing every symptom, pinch, or twang waiting for doom. So hard to snap out of that mindset! The most amazing detail of this pregnancy is the current due date. Yes it can change, yes the baby may come early or late, BUT it was still amazing to hear “April 22nd”. That is my most loved and amazing Grandmother’s birthday. She passed away last year and always said that we will be parents but it will happen on God’s time. Well I think she had a hand in this one. I love her and miss her so much so maybe that is why IVF didn’t work the first time. Maybe it was meant to be that my child would share the birthday of such an amazing human being. Maybe my grandma really is my guardian angel and looking down on me. I’ve always had a hard time grasping that whole concept but maybe this was her way of saying “HEY!! I am here!!!”

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